CatBounce

With finals starting only next week, now is not a good time to procrastinate studying. That is, unless you are checking out one, or all, of the following worthwhile web distractions.

1. Kate Upton & Snoop Dogg – You Got What I Eat (Hot Pockets Music Video)

This is a music video featuring Snoop Dogg that doubles as an advertisement for the favorite microwavable meal Hot Pockets. Watch Snoop take model Kate Upton into the crust-laden fantasy land of Sky High Bakery to the tune of a sampled Biz Markie classic, “Just a Friend.” Maybe we can expect Hot Pockets to drop their old jingle — see Jim Gaffigan’s stand-up for reasons why — and keep Snoop around to assist with further advertisement.

2. CAT BOUNCE!

This simple site succeeds in appeasing both cat lovers and haters. Cat lovers will like it because it has cats. Cat haters will like it because you can throw said cats across the length of your computer screen. No gore is involved, however. Another interesting feature is that if you click the text that reads “Make it rain!” in the upper left corner, a shower of additional cats descends from the sky. Meow.

3. Helicopter Game

Enjoy a throwback to the self-described “best free online Flash game in history.” Click your mouse or touchpad as you navigate a helicopter through an ominous black and green wasteland, where many-a-copter have fallen before. Avoid levitating green rectangles, and see how far you can fly until your index finger grows too weary to continue. Have competitions with your friends, and while you are at it, see if you can beat the writer’s recent high score of 2,545.

4. Read all your old tweets

For about a year now , Twitter has had the option available to access every tweet you have ever tweeted. Ever. Accessing these tweets is simple. On your computer, log in to Twitter, go to Settings, scroll down and click on “Request your archive.” Shortly after doing this, Twitter will email you all your tweets in a handy dandy Excel spreadsheet. Enjoy perusing all of your tweeted musings, and do not be afraid to share your favorites with the Twitterverse.

5. Gizoogle

Browse the internet with what Urban Dictionary has affectionately referred to as “Snoop Dogg’s Google.” Simply type something into the search bar and stare in amazement at the hip, new translation of your standard English. For example, by accessing the Wikipedia entry for Concordia through Gizoogle, one is able to enjoy sentences like, “Founded by Norwegian settlaz up in 1891, tha school has become associated wit tha Evangelical Lutheran Church up in Tha Ghetto n’ practices tha liberal arts.”

Alex Gray

Alex Gray '16 is majoring in social studies education. On campus, he serves as an SGA sophomore representative, competes in parliamentary debate, and drums in the Jazz I ensemble; off campus, he is an assistant speech coach at Moorhead High School. In his free time, Alex enjoys drinking Diet Mountain Dew, listening to the drum stylings of Dave King, and napping. When at home, he spends most of his time with dachshunds Bowser and Lucky, who are his world.

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