As I sit here writing this article, flipping through TV channels, checking my Facebook, Twitter, Reddit and Klout accounts, I keep seeing these list articles. BuzzFeed, Thought Catalog and so on making lists. Things of that ilk penetrate my newsfeed many, many times a day. It all got me thinking: what would I make a list about? I mean I could have the obvious articles and lists about why shouting is the optimal form of communication, why being a taurus is the bomb, why Harry Potter is forever, but more or less, I think the list we need to have is one of things we should not be ashamed of. I get so sick of seeing Instagram photos of things people post with the hashtag #guiltypleasure. It just gives me this feeling that they are making a bad decision, but then I also get the impression that I should feel guilty for doing that incredibly normal thing. So here goes.
Netflix power streaming. I adamantly refuse to feel guilty for devoting my time to something that I find wildly enjoyable. I watched all of “Orange is the New Black” in a day. Want to know why? Because I could. Yes, it screwed up my schedule for the rest of the week, but I did not care. I was happy. Within reason, no one should make you feel bad for it. Everyone has that one weird obsession, be it “Gossip Girl,” “Hey, Arnold!” or what have you.
Talking too loudly. I am done apologizing for being louder than you. I am sorry that your mouse voice cannot reach nearly as many ears as my drill sergeant bellowing can. Do I accidentally shout in church and various other non-shouty places? Yes. Am I going to cry about how embarrassed I am that other people heard me? Absolutely not, because there is no point. Yes, this invites eavesdroppers, but hey, the more the merrier. Make it a party.
Being unrealistic. Hey, I have big dreams, but people are so quick to judge them that I keep them to myself. No one likes having their feelings hurt, so I get a bit annoyed when people want to rain on my proverbial parade. So let me think that one day I will become an eco-benevolent Tony Stark with an Iron Man suit made out of milk jugs and rope, bringing clean water to all the people everywhere, because just as impossible as it sounds, it is a damn fun dream to have.
Not knowing what I want to do. Yo, how many times do I have to publicly post on the internet that I have no idea what I want to do with my future? Because everyone getting on my back about it is starting to make me want to take out an ad in the Forum. I am 21 years old, everyone, and I want to be happy. If that means working six random jobs at a time to make money while I Google “How to live in England forever,” then so be it.
Liking One Direction or some other artist that no one likes at our age because we are “too old” for it. No. Take your music that sounds like an emo banjo band and leave me alone with my perfectly autotuned boy band. We too happy over here singing about happiness, love and how girls do not know they are beautiful to hear you judging us.
Liking these lists. Seems a bit like tautology, no? But seriously, I pity people who think BuzzFeed, Twitter, Thought Catalog and Facebook are not educational or viable as entertainment. I have learned more about the Sochi Olympic situation from BuzzFeed than anywhere else, same thing with the Boston Marathon Bombing and other major news stories. While yes, they may not have a “60 Minutes” air about them, they are faster and use more people on their stories, providing faster news to me and other readers across the world. Is that wrong? No. Plus Twitter is becoming a juggernaut in online news with the amount of major news sources and reporters using it as marketing.
As I end this list, I am heading off to go purchase an obscene amount of Ben & Jerry’s Ice Cream to eat by myself while I watch “The Holiday” and write a paper alone in my apartment, and none of it is making me feel guilty. I hope all of you have at least one “guilty pleasure” that is no longer guilty. Stay happy, Cobbs.
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