Knowing what is coming is overrated

Why being happy rumps being about to predict the future

I am so sick of the two lines “20 Things everyone should know in their Twenties” and “20 useful tips when you’re Twenty” that I could just about sob into my keyboard. That being said, I had a moment this weekend where I got all kinds of concerned. A friend of mine had no idea that heating units and air conditioner units control different things, so when we said to turn down the heat, she reached for the dial on the A/C, leading to much laughter and a brief moment of concern for her future.

So what? Definitely not the biggest problem I have ever seen. Instead, I was struck with this weird acknowledgement of the fact that she did not know everything, and neither did I.

“What’s that?” you say. “Katelyn doesn’t know everything?” No, I do not. I do not quite know how mortgages works, I cannot cook a Thanksgiving dinner, I have no idea what it actually means to “find yourself,” and if that means meditation, then I am Outie 5000.

Beyond those things, I also cannot tell you with any certainty what I want to do with my life. Seriously, I have zero ideas. And if any of you know me, you know exactly how many expletives would need to have been tossed in that sentence for you to fully understand just how much I do not know. I have a job that is almost a full-time gig, I have family everywhere and a strange newfound obsession with grad school. So many options, but I genuinely have no idea.

Now, most of you have stopped reading because you do not care, but the rest are still here with me. Kudos. While I have been living in this weird panic-induced existential home for the past month, one thing has gotten me through. I have one goal: be happy. Most of you know I really cannot be bothered to lie, but I also cannot be bothered to do things I hate. I will quit jobs and find something new. Some would say this is me giving up quickly, others would say it is a process of elimination; I call it being honest. I have only ever had one job I hated that lasted a prolonged period of time, and I never want to have to do that again.

So I reiterate, I want to be happy. I want to be happy on my own terms, barring any 20-something list or parent or sibling. While those people have the best in mind for me, I need to remind myself to break away, because otherwise my life will not be my life. I want to own my life, my choices and my happiness.

So, stay cool and stay convicted. Because if there is any group of people I can think of who will understand me, it is my fellow Cobbers. Stay golden, Corn Cobs!