Welcome back kids! We’re in full swing: I am already doing philosophy research and have already successfully forgotten about my Astronomy lab this Tuesday! Anyway, beyond the boring school things, I need to tell you about two gems: “Catfish” and “Buckwild.” One time I wrote about TV hate spirals. This is so much greater. Nev…
I am writing this article for you in my townhouse, surrounded by seven books, a graphing calculator, and four cans of Coke. It is quite obvious that I have been managing stress in my own unique and entirely disgusting way. I have honestly forgotten what it was like in high school when my night ended…
Hello my financially stable and sound Cobbers. Oh wait. It is the week after Black Friday and Cyber Monday. So if any of you are like me and felt a compelling urge to invest in some new skinny yoga pants, dresses, shoes, electronics, DVDs and various other items instead of paying off your Cobber ring,…
Hey kids. I would just like to go hand-in-hand with this week’s theme of forced niceness, and say that no, there are things in the world you can openly hate. I understand that in Minnesota, we like to be nice to everyone and then talk about them later and just be overly pleasant all the…
Halloween is drawing nigh, and like just about everyone else I am feigning apathy. I’m jacked like you wouldn’t believe to see all of the ladies to be dressed like the elegant women they want to be and the men dressed as the hardcore gents they can’t handle thinking about. But really you guys I…
Well hello teeny-tiny Cobber babies! It is homecoming, and this week is crazy! We have alumni of all types coming to our Cobberland home. Students who just graduated and people who graduated many years ago. I actually just came home to Concordia from Boston, Mass., and am so excited to see everything well underway. This…
So here’s the thing. None of us can honestly say we don’t watch TV. And hush to all of you imaginary Ivers/Jones kids who think they are too busy for shows. You know exactly what you do. You lie. “Too busy.” Ha. Funny. I don’t remember you being too busy with your future on your…
Yes I know, I’m writing about fads. It happens. Dear Cobber babies that think you are too mainstream for fads, or that you were the first one to ever do whatever it is I’m about to mention—stop that. Stop thinking that. Fads are fads and that is all there is to it. No one is…
So I wrote my first article and (giant shocker) it wasn’t about freshmen. Well here I am, a week late and ready to chat about freshmen. Can I tell you guys something? I am a junior. I get to say things like “back in my day,” or, “oh my gosh… oral comm,” and “when I…
For my first article of the year I would usually do something like “aaahhh I have missed everyone,” or how no one should ever be caught with a lanyard around their neck, but I think I want to talk about something a little more dear to us. In the past few years it has become…